I just felt so hurt yesterday........like many other times a friend phones me in the afternoon......."will you please look after the two boys for a few hours?" Sure I said...."we don't have anyone else to look after them, I don't know what else to do?" she says.
Okay, the first thing that just completely makes me want to through down the phone....AGAIN I'm the last one to be phoned, I'm like in REALLY the last option! And I can hear the hesitance in her voice in leaving the kids with me......
No problem I reply, you can bring them over anytime.
"Okay, thanks, will bring them over" she says......
So 2hours later, nothing.....I phone her to find out what's going on, haven't heard anything from them? This is the 2nd thing they always do.......I always have to phone them to find out what's happening!
"oh, I'm still at home with the boys and hubby took **** to the...... I'm trying to get hold of my sister in law so that she can come watch the kids here....they're a bit sick and so they're difficult, but I'll wait around and let you know what's going on"
Till today haven't heard one word, not a phone call, not a sms - nothing just to let me know what's for what?
Let me just say this.....I know I have no "mommy" experience, I know I never had the privilege to bring my own children into this world. I know I have no experience in sitting up all night caring for a sick child..........BUT PLEASE I'M 30YEARS OLD AND WILL FOR DAMN SURE KNOW HOW TO BABYSIT YOUR CHILD! It's not the first time I've looked after someones kiddies!!!!
What hurts me so very much is the fact that the "chain" goes as follows: "her parents" "his parents" "her brothers and sisters" "the maid" "other friends with kids"............................okay let's phone Liv...........
That just really hurt and makes me feel so useless and not needed as a friend....why phone me in the first place if you don't trust me, and why phone if you in the end in anyways decide to not bring them, and why not just have the decency to let me know when you've made other arrangements????
I just hate being infertile, I hate being seen as someone who is good enough to give "extra" attention to your kids because I don't have my own, BUT on the other hand, who's not trusted enough or competent enough to babysit them for a few hours.........Please don't ask me again!!
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Hi nice om jou weer te sien op die blog!!!
ReplyDeleteHugs my friend, you can babysit mine anytime !
ReplyDeleteThanks Tams, you can bring that cutie of yours over ANYTIME!!!
ReplyDeleteDear Liv,
ReplyDeleteI can understand your point of view. However my IF friend is also last on my list when I have to find a babysitter. Not because i dont trust her, she is awesome. But when she babysits I know she is thinking my son should have been playing with her little one in the living room.( we fell pregnant a month apart, she mc at 11w - she had the agonizing task of living thru my pregnancy) I can not help to think that i am adding to her sadness when my son is around. I would do anything to spare her the hurt and sandness. Alas this is her sadness and i can not begin to understand. BUT and this is a big butt... i think it was inconsidarate of your friend messing you around and not making definate arrangements.